I wanted to to take this moment to share with you something that my mother has yet to fully understand. The reason why I whine. Mummy says it is unreasonable to scream and shout as I do. So I have listed below my top reasons for having a catastrophic meltdown. I would just like to add that this is only a sample list and by no means an extensive compilation. I have the right to add more reasons to whine at any point.
Top ten reasons I Whine
1. One or other of my socks is wet – usually because I have kicked the dogs water bowl all over the kitchen floor.
2. Leading on from the wet sock, I can now not get my dry socks on and keep getting my toes caught in the heel area.
3. Mum has asked me to go to the toilet without placing any bribe or incentive in the offing.
4. I have asked how we are getting somewhere and Mummy has said we are walking (even if we aren’t, she does this just to wind me up somedays).
5. I have woken up – plain and simple.
6. I have lost my Harry Potter wand (usually it’s not lost its just rolled off the couch), this one comes with full on screaming ‘I can’t find it’
7. When Mummy ignores my satnav capabilities in the car and drives what I am sure is the wrong way.
8. If somebody shuts the downstairs door. Even if I am asleep I know this has happened.
9. I have been given the wrong water bottle for school, these things matter and no I won’t tell you which one I want when you ask but just protest about whichever one you give me.
10. One or both of the Sausages snaffle my half eaten biscuit out of my hand.
I could go on and on. My life as a 4 year old is a world of injustice and hardship. But right now I have to have my 14 pre preschool meltdowns, many of which have been featured above. Oh no, is this, can it be a WET SOCK…. ‘MUuUUuMm!!’
Love Pie x